The 7th and 8th of August are special days for the Littlewood family. Alex and I went to the temple for the first time to take receive our endowments then we took Wyatt with us the next day to be sealed together. What an amazing time that was for us!! Going from a rebellious stage in life, to meeting Alex, to our brief time together dating, to getting engaged, to finding out we were pregnant, and to getting married only a month later. Life has been a rollercoaster. And even though I'm not a fan of rollercoasters I'd ride this one anytime!
I have been reflecting a lot lately and find that I still feel quite weird about it. Two years ago today Alex and I went to the temple for the first time! It really was amazing. But nothing could compare to how I would feel the next day when we were to be sealed together as a family. Pure complete joy! I don't think I've ever felt something as pure as that (other than the two births of my babies).
But. (Yes there is a but) I struggle. I AM struggling with certain things. And people notice. And then those people think it's okay and its appropriate to say things like "I'm disappointed in you" and "I've noticed you've not been wearing..", etc. What? What gives a person a right to say things like that? You only see posts on Facebook and not what goes on in real life. I like to share what goes on in my life and my families. But that doesn't mean you can judge me based off of a few pictures you see on Facebook.
I love the church. Dearly! And I love the amazing people I have met through the church and its organizations! But I do not love that some of these people think they can judge me because of what I wear or don't wear, what I drink or how I look. I am still a good person.
I feel like I'm ranting but I'm just frustrated. I want to be happy and openly celebrate with my friends and family. But I feel weird and judged because I struggle with wearing the garments. Because of that I feel like I don't have a right to be happy about this time in my life. I don't have a right to celebrate something so amazing.
Anyways, this is more or less just a rant. But I was bothered and needed to get this out!
I have been reflecting a lot lately and find that I still feel quite weird about it. Two years ago today Alex and I went to the temple for the first time! It really was amazing. But nothing could compare to how I would feel the next day when we were to be sealed together as a family. Pure complete joy! I don't think I've ever felt something as pure as that (other than the two births of my babies).
But. (Yes there is a but) I struggle. I AM struggling with certain things. And people notice. And then those people think it's okay and its appropriate to say things like "I'm disappointed in you" and "I've noticed you've not been wearing..", etc. What? What gives a person a right to say things like that? You only see posts on Facebook and not what goes on in real life. I like to share what goes on in my life and my families. But that doesn't mean you can judge me based off of a few pictures you see on Facebook.
I love the church. Dearly! And I love the amazing people I have met through the church and its organizations! But I do not love that some of these people think they can judge me because of what I wear or don't wear, what I drink or how I look. I am still a good person.
I feel like I'm ranting but I'm just frustrated. I want to be happy and openly celebrate with my friends and family. But I feel weird and judged because I struggle with wearing the garments. Because of that I feel like I don't have a right to be happy about this time in my life. I don't have a right to celebrate something so amazing.
Anyways, this is more or less just a rant. But I was bothered and needed to get this out!
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